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	<title>crocodiles Archives - EscapeArtistes</title>
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		<title>Before I Kill You, Mr Bond . . .</title>
		<link>https://www.escapeartistes.com/2010/02/01/before-i-kill-you-mr-bond/</link>
					<comments>https://www.escapeartistes.com/2010/02/01/before-i-kill-you-mr-bond/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Theodora]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 01 Feb 2010 19:28:31 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Cambodia]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>There&#8217;s something of the Wild West about Sihanoukville, Cambodia. A sort of post-Soviet Wild West, where Hummers park off Soviet Avenue, portraits of two kings&#46;&#46;&#46;</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.escapeartistes.com/2010/02/01/before-i-kill-you-mr-bond/">Before I Kill You, Mr Bond . . .</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.escapeartistes.com">EscapeArtistes</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://travelswithanineyearold.files.wordpress.com/2010/01/img_0076.jpg"><img decoding="async" class="size-thumbnail wp-image-70" title="Dinner" src="https://www.escapeartistes.com//wp-content/uploads/2012/08/img_0076.jpg" alt="" width="150" height="112" /></a>There&#8217;s something of the Wild West about Sihanoukville, Cambodia. A sort of post-Soviet Wild West, where Hummers park off Soviet Avenue, portraits of two kings and the Queen adorn the brutalist concrete of Independence Square, candy-coloured cod-Buddhism is just a step up the hill, the crime rate is the highest in Cambodia, backpacker guesthouses and low-rent girlie bars fight over hillside space, and, oh god, did I mention the snakes?</p>
<p>The elegant Nikolai, who owns the Snake House restaurant, the Airport disco and an exquisite and extremely expensive island, is responsible for the snake thing. </p>
<p>Cambodia is home to ten of the world&#8217;s most dangerous snakes, disconcerting information given the medical care is some of the worst in the world north of the Sahara.</p>
<p>Tourists die quite frequently, having gone out to the jungle in flip-flops and shorts, sans guide, disregarding four decades worth of unexploded ordnance and aforementioned wildlife to take a little walk on the wild side.</p>
<p>Because if the guesthouse plays Bob Marley, what could possibly go wrong?</p>
<p>Nikolai, apparently, is the only man in the entire country who has a clue what to do when pit vipers/king cobras/krait take askance to one&#8217;s presence. Handy if you&#8217;re in Sihanoukville. Less so elsewhere.</p>
<p>One recommendation is to pour boiling water on the bite. In theory this coagulates the venom and slows its progress through the system.</p>
<p>Then pray, I guess.</p>
<p>A trained vet, Nikolai arrived from Moscow with a vision. A restaurant full of snakes.</p>
<p>It would be fair to say his taste in decor tends to the Bond villain. Snake House has snakes living in the table-tops, a chained crocodile lolling amid exotic palms, and colonial bamboo furnishings under a hessian roof.</p>
<div id="attachment_620" style="width: 510px" class="wp-caption alignleft"><a href="https://www.escapeartistes.com//wp-content/uploads/2012/08/crocodile-snake-house-sihanoukville-cambodia.jpg"><img fetchpriority="high" decoding="async" aria-describedby="caption-attachment-620" src="https://www.escapeartistes.com//wp-content/uploads/2012/08/crocodile-snake-house-sihanoukville-cambodia.jpg" alt="Chained crocodile at Snake House restaurant, Sihanoukville, Cambodia" title="crocodile-snake-house-sihanoukville-cambodia" width="500" height="375" class="size-full wp-image-620" /></a><p id="caption-attachment-620" class="wp-caption-text">Will go like the clappers once off the chain</p></div>
<p>Eating <a href="https://www.escapeartistes.com//2010/02/27/cambodian-food/">Cambodian mushrooms</a> pickled Russian style while vipers and cobras dart and squirm in one&#8217;s peripheral vision is definitely an experience.</p>
<p>Yet Snake House has grown beyond commerce, beyond passion and into a brilliant obsession.</p>
<p>What was once a single, relatively restrained line of scary creatures behind glass on astroturf is now a maze of ferns and cages, giving onto a frankly baronial moat populated by a small army of crocodiles, cages full of tropical birds, fish, sea turtles, terrapins . . .</p>
<p>Perhaps most surreal of all are the cute little bunny rabbits shaded by banana plants. Petting zoo in the making? Or dinner for the crocs? Time will tell, I guess.</p>
<p>Nikolai&#8217;s primary vehicle is an Aston Martin with a skeleton riding shotgun. He also, word has it, owns a Porsche, an original MacLaren, and a few other nippy little runabouts. (The Hummers belong to his managers.)</p>
<p>Finding that local roads rather removed not only the point but also the suspension from his fleet, Nikolai prevailed on the powers that be, AKA the Cambodian People&#8217;s Party, to open the disused airfield so he and his friends can race his vehicles.</p>
<p><div id="attachment_623" style="width: 510px" class="wp-caption alignleft"><a href="https://www.escapeartistes.com//wp-content/uploads/2012/08/cockpit-antonov-plane-airport-sihanoukville-cambodia.jpg"><img decoding="async" aria-describedby="caption-attachment-623" src="https://www.escapeartistes.com//wp-content/uploads/2012/08/cockpit-antonov-plane-airport-sihanoukville-cambodia.jpg" alt="Z in the cockpit of an Antonov plane at Airport discotheque, Sihanoukville, Cambodia" title="cockpit-antonov-plane-airport-sihanoukville-cambodia" width="500" height="375" class="size-full wp-image-623" /></a><p id="caption-attachment-623" class="wp-caption-text">Z appreciates the man's decorative genius.</p></div>Perhaps in homage to this, Nikolai called his second venture Airport. He flew in an Antonov-24 transport from Russia, suspended it in concrete, built a hangar over the top, slapped a few trucks in for good measure, and lo!, Sihanoukville&#8217;s finest beachfront discotheque was born.</p>
<p>Complete with someone&#8217;s great-grandmother to pick every single stray leaf off the lovingly landscaped beach with a rake.</p>
<p>Only in Cambodia? Possibly.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://www.escapeartistes.com/2010/02/01/before-i-kill-you-mr-bond/">Before I Kill You, Mr Bond . . .</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.escapeartistes.com">EscapeArtistes</a>.</p>
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